


A Roomba of One's Own

by grey2510, ThayerKerbasy



Category: Supernatural
Genre: An AU of other canon-divergent AUs, Crowley's final will and testament goes horribly wrong, Episode Fix-It: s15e20 Carry On, Finale What Finale, Gen, Hell on Earth verse, Post-Canon, Post-Episode: s12e23 All Along the Watchtower, Team No Chill verse, You Decide, chattybubble fic, or horribly right, sorta - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:35:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28051758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grey2510/pseuds/grey2510, https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThayerKerbasy/pseuds/ThayerKerbasy
Summary: Chuck was right: endings are hard. Any chapped-ass monkey with a keyboard can poop out a beginning, but sometimes you need two fans with abadamazing habit of writing genius-level fics to each other in a chat to figure out how to tie up all the loose ends of a show in a stunning masterpiece of storytelling.
Comments: 34
Kudos: 19
Collections: SPNColdestHits





	A Roomba of One's Own

**Author's Note:**

> There have been many fics that Thayer and I have written which have sadly disappeared into the chat void of Tumblr or Discord, because we know the world isn't ready for such brilliance. There are others that we have preserved and fleshed out into fics that still humble us when we see the love our readers have given them.
> 
> This is neither.
> 
> Enjoy?

**GREY2510:** [ https://shirtlesssammy.tumblr.com/post/636684443519713280/deletingpoint-obsessionisaperfume ](https://shirtlesssammy.tumblr.com/post/636684443519713280/deletingpoint-obsessionisaperfume)

I was surprised that texting and murder sheriff became the new Death

**THAYERKERBASY:**

And oooh I like the finale you saw

My favourite part was when the bunker ate Chuck

**GREY2510:**

And now the Bunker wants a tastier snack... Chuck was kinda stale

**THAYERKERBASY:**

oh no!

I guess Jack just has to bring back Crowley so the Bunker can eat the sulphur he leaves behind

**GREY2510:**

A reasonable solution

Also I always find it hilarious that sulphur was a demon omen because I just imagine Crowley being SO offended that any of his work or being is associated with the smell of rotten eggs

**THAYERKERBASY:**

lol seriously

**GREY2510:**

.... Crowley gets a Stabby to follow him around

Bonus...it knicks the ankles of minions who aren't paying attention

**THAYERKERBASY:**

yeessssss

**GREY2510:**

[ Well Endowed AU ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11709525/chapters/26370930) where Dean inherits a cursed Roomba

**THAYERKERBASY:**

....what does it say about me that I want this?

**GREY2510:**

This AU quickly morphs into a  [ Team No Chill AU ](https://archiveofourown.org/series/801555) too because you betcha Stabby joins the crew

And it says that you have impeccable taste

**THAYERKERBASY:**

lol Team No Chill would call Stabby a try hard

"pfft you need weapons?"

**GREY2510:**

Stabby speaks in all caps

MUST CLEAN AND POKE ANKLES

**THAYERKERBASY:**

ahahaha yessssss

**GREY2510:**

Mac tries to be nice and welcoming at first but even he's like ummmm Coleman can I hide behind you. You're nice and metal

Baby is just like if that roomba comes anywhere NEAR my upholstery

**THAYERKERBASY:**

yeah, Stabby wouldn't be welcome

**GREY2510:**

Maybe not at first

Stabby redemption arc

**THAYERKERBASY:**

LOL

**GREY2510:**

They come to love their angry stabby friend

**THAYERKERBASY:**

Stabby doesn't leave the Bunker much though

cleaning an infinitely large eldritch entity is a full time job

**GREY2510:**

Haha

**THAYERKERBASY:**

not to mention all the ankles that need warning slashes

**GREY2510:**

The Bunker approves of this little stabby creature

**THAYERKERBASY:**

I love the idea of the Bunker not being able to tell if Stabby is alive or not and erring on the side of yes

**GREY2510:**

Lol yes

**THAYERKERBASY:**

it notices that Stabby eats crumbs, so it leaves some in strategic locations

**GREY2510:**

And moves the hallways around for optimal ankle slashing

**THAYERKERBASY:**

lol yes

the guys are Not Pleased

"For the last time, who the hell thought a knife on a roomba was a good idea?"

**GREY2510:**

Sam's just like all I want is to make my smoothies in peace

And Dean's like hey not my fault you're the only one who can stand the smell of whatever leafy crap you put in them. Or what comes outta you later. I think Stabby's doing a great job

**THAYERKERBASY:**

LOL yes

**GREY2510:**

When the Dean Cave starts to resemble a frat house, Dean's ankles are in jeopardy

**THAYERKERBASY:**

Dean: AAAHH! What the hell, Stabby?!

Sam: I think Stabby's doing a great job

**GREY2510:**

DON'T QUOTE ME TO ME

**THAYERKERBASY:**

lol

**GREY2510:**

*gathers up beer bottles and burger wrappers, still grumbling*

**THAYERKERBASY:**

oh look, we just wrote a better episode than the finale

**GREY2510:**

Hahaha I was literally just about to say that

**THAYERKERBASY:**

LOL

**GREY2510:**

Like even a pissed off roomba ruining their lives in little ways is a more satisfying ending

**THAYERKERBASY:**

seriously

**Author's Note:**

> #sorrynotsorry
> 
> Written for Coldest Hits:  
> [Here was the prompt and rules for this month!](https://spncoldesthits.tumblr.com/post/635330147450535936/december-2020-prompt-fix-it-posting-dates)


End file.
